


Struck Me Through The Heart (Also the Chest)

by SalamanderGoo



Series: Trans/NB Grumps [2]
Category: Game Grumps
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Arin is GNC, Fluff, M/M, Multi, Soulmates feel each other's pain, Trans Barry Kramer, Trans Dan Avidan, Trans Male Characters
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-07
Updated: 2020-01-07
Packaged: 2021-02-24 22:20:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,492
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22165411
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SalamanderGoo/pseuds/SalamanderGoo
Summary: Dan is used to small pangs of pain that aren't his.  Scrapes and bruises that aren't on his skin, stomach aches, some back pain, pleasant aches in the gut like he laughed too hard.  Even a broken arm when he'd been in high school.  He knew there was someone else to felt his pain too, like the headaches he got or when he'd been sick and bedridden.  But when he's struck by intense pain in the chest, he has to wonder... is his soulmate like him?
Relationships: Background Ross O'Donovan/Original Nonbinary Character, Background Suzy Berhow/Arin Hanson/Brian Wecht, Dan Avidan & Brian Wecht, Dan Avidan/Barry Kramer
Series: Trans/NB Grumps [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1601302
Comments: 2
Kudos: 21
Collections: Game Grumps Holiday Exchange 2019





	Struck Me Through The Heart (Also the Chest)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [vinndetta](https://archiveofourown.org/users/vinndetta/gifts).



> You said soulmate AU and mentioned trans headcanons, sooooo happy late holidays! I heavily considered nb Brian, but I wasn't quite sure how to shove that in here, so that's just on my list of things I need to write at a different time ig.
> 
> I wanted to get this out before anonymity was lifted, but oh well!

It was a hot summer afternoon when the pain hit him. He was laying upside down on Brian’s couch, the two of them throwing ideas at a wall to see what stuck. Literally. Brian had covered a paper on the wall with double sided tape and was throwing crumpled up pieces of notebook paper at it. Dan had been laughing, enjoying the stupid game. But then he gasped loudly, his legs falling from the back of the couch. “Danny?” Brian turned to look at him with a frown. “Dan, what’s wrong?”

“Fuck, my chest…” He held a hand to his chest, curling in a ball. “Feels like I’m being stabbed…”

Brian moved to sit next to him, lightly rubbing his back. “Have you been wearing your binder too long?”

“Not wearing it today, just a sports bra.” He groaned, laying his head on Brian’s thigh. “It’s gotta be my soulmate…”

Brian began to pet his hair. “Deep breaths. Do you want me to get you something for the pain?”

Dan shook his head. Pain meds only helped so much when it wasn’t his pain. “No, no, just stay, please.”

“I won’t leave, okay? Just breathe.” He frowned, watching Dan shift uncomfortably, groaning as he held his chest. “Do you think it might be surgery?”

“...Maybe they’re trans too, you mean?”

“They could be.” Brian smiled when Dan looked at him with big eyes. “What, never consider that?”

“...Not really.” He winced at another sharp pain. “...it’d be super cool actually. I wouldn’t have to be like, scared. They’d get it.”

“They’ll know why they feel like they get stabbed in the ass every month.” Brian grinned, avoiding a swat at the head. “And no, I won’t hold back telling them that you need help giving yourself T shots.”

“You’re so mean!” Dan pouted, but winced again. “Ow.”

“I’ve got you, Danny.” Brian offered a small smile. “I’ll make you some tea, okay?”

“Thanks.” He sighed softly, curling up tighter on the couch. “Then we go back to songwriting?”

“Sure.” Brian grabbed a paper that had stuck. “Let’s see what we’re working with.” He uncrumpled it, grinning. “Danny Sexbang is a wizard.”

“I’m into it. Make me tea first.”

“So demanding.” Brian laughed as he headed to his tiny kitchen to start the hot water, humming to himself. Dan closed his eyes, sighing softly. It was nice hanging out with Brian. He was the best band partner Dan had ever had. He rubbed his chest with a frown, mentally wishing his soulmate the best.

The next week wasn’t exactly fun for Dan. His chest was sore and just made him feel tired. Of course, he knew he got it easy if it was some kind of chest surgery. His soulmate would have a rough time adjusting, and he just silently wished them a smooth recovery whoever they were.

He and Brian kept pushing forward with songwriting, their second album falling into place, music video ideas being scrawled down, and a whole lot of time being spent dicking around instead of actually writing. Dan had half forgotten about the chest pain when they were reached out to by an animator.

Brian had texted Dan while he was at work, working at a small bar to make ends meet. Dan distantly thought that Brian had just gotten home from lecturing, wincing when he slammed his hand on the bar as he was reaching for a shaker. “Shit!” He shook his hand, frowning. He glared down at his split knuckle, pressing it to his jeans to soak up the blood. “Hey Jake, mind taking over for a few minutes while I grab a band aid?”

As he slipped away from the bar, he called Brian and shoved his phone between his shoulder and cheek. “Brian? Hey, I’ve got a few minutes because I hurt myself like a dumbass.”

“You okay? I’m tempted to laugh but I don’t know how bad it is.”

“I’m fine, slammed my hand against the bar.” He grabbed a band aid from a first aid kit. “Also I kinda wish I wasn’t wearing my binder, but I’ve only got a little while before my shift ends so it’s whatever.”

Brian laughed, making Dan roll his eyes. “Cool, glad to know you never disappoint. Go into the bathroom if you need to take it off, don’t hurt yourself like a dumbass. Anyway, we have a pretty cool offer on the table. Have you ever heard of Egoraptor?”

“You know the stegosaurus is my favorite.”

“Very funny. He’s an animator, a pretty popular one at that. He sent an email to us and is wondering if we’d be interested in an animation of one of our songs.”

“Really?” Dan almost dropped the band aid, poking his tongue out as he worked to stick it on his hand. “That would be… really incredible!”

“Yeah. I was thinking, obviously if your thoughts are in the same direction, we could do something with Dinosaur Laser Fight? I know we have ideas running, but some animated sequences could work really well with that particular style of song.”

“Oh, definitely. I’ll look him up once I get home, just to see like, his style.” Dan winced a little as he flexed his hand. “Is this something where like, we need to meet up with him in person, or is emailing or texting fine through this?”

“I’ll see if he wants to meet up, but I think we’ll be fine just emailing through the process. Besides, he seems to know what he’s doing.”

“Alright.” Dan glanced at the clock. “I should get back to work, but text me if anything comes up, okay? I’ll be off in like an hour and a half.”

“Try not to hurt yourself more Dan! Love you, man.”

Dan rolled his eyes, smiling. “Don’t get sappy, old man. Love you too!” He hung up with a grin. Brian was stupid. But he was Dan’s stupid best friend. He shoved his phone in his pocket before heading back to the bar.

Things kept… changing. Dan felt a little like he wasn’t keeping up with all the changes, especially when Brian moved. He left to teach in London. On one hand, Dan was happy for him, this was something Brian had been working towards his entire career. On the other hand, he felt abandoned. He didn’t want to be mad, but he couldn’t help it. Brian had been the first constant in his life in years, and now he was an ocean away.

He was sulking in his apartment, pretending he wasn’t missing Brian, when his phone alerted him of a text. He was expecting it to be Brian, but it wasn’t. It was from Arin. He frowned as he read the text, asking if he wanted to meet up at a coffee shop later in the afternoon. He quickly responded that he’d be there, asking why he wanted to meet, but Arin kept his response vague.

Dan sighed, glancing at the clock as he stood up. He had a few hours to kill.

He ended up just going to the coffee shop early, nursing a cup of tea and nibbling on a cookie. He kept an eye on the door, smiling when he saw Arin, wearing a flashy pink sunhat. “Hey!”

“Dan, hi! It’s good to see you again.”

“Yeah, it’s been, what, almost a year?”

“About.” He hummed. “I’m gonna go get a coffee real quick, hang tight.” Dan nodded, watching as he ordered himself a drink. He scrolled through his phone, humming softly to himself as he waited. “Okay, so I’m sure you’re wondering why I wanted to meet up.”

“Maybe a little.” Dan laughed, putting his phone down as Arin sat across from him.

“Well, I‘m sure you know about my gaming show. I’ll be blunt. I want to offer you the position of my co host on the main show.”

“...you have a co host.”

“Not for long.” Arin hummed. “We’re officially calling it a creative dispute. He’s heading off to do his own thing, whatever that may be. But you would be a wonderful addition to the show. You’re funny and creative, and I like to think we’ve got a little bit of chemistry.”

Dan smiled a little. “Well… I’d love to, but I’ve gotta talk to Brian. And kinda… figure some shit out.”

“Of course. I don’t expect you to know exactly if you want to right now. Although, I can’t give you too long to sleep on it. After all, if you decide to join me, we’ll have to start recording pretty soon, just to get some videos on deck and get ready to introduce you to the fans.” He took a sip of his coffee, watching Dan.

“...right.” Dan nodded, looking down at his coffee. “So… who else is there? Aside from you?”

“Well, my fiancé Suzy is kind of our manager in a way, with like, merch and stuff. We’re looking into maybe hiring someone to be an actual manager since she’s got her own channel, but she’s honestly incredible. And our editor is Barry, who’s super sweet and funny and really good at what he does! And my friend Ross is working on moving here and is going to be hosting a show. Which I was thinking maybe you might want to join him on? Of course if you’re hosting the main show with me, that would be a lot, but I think you and Ross would get along!”

Dan nodded. “Okay… I’d have to meet the guy, but yeah.” He picked up his phone, staring at the time for a long moment.

“...you okay?”

“Yeah I just can’t do math.” He frowned. “Nah, it’s too early. I was trying to figure out what time it is for Brian, but he’d probably be teaching. I’ll call him later.”

Arin laughed a little. “Ah, time zones?”

“Yeah. They’re stupid!” He shook his head with a small smile. “Anyway, you’re engaged now?”

“Yeah! I proposed to Suzy last year. We’re working on wedding plans right now. I… can’t wait to be married to her. She’s just so incredible, you know?” He grinned. “She’s even helping me look for a veil. I think I’m just gonna go for a suit other than that though.”

Dan smiled softly. “That’s awesome man. I know it’s kinda rude to ask but are you two…?”

“Soulmates? Yeah.” He laughed a little. “We didn’t even realize until I ran into a wall and she grabbed her head. We just stared at each other for a long moment and I kicked the coffee table.” He grinned. “She threw a pillow at me because it hurt.”

“That’s… incredibly cute.”

“A little.“ Arin winked. “Have you found yours?”

“Nah, not yet. All I’ve got to go on is that they got chest surgery a few years ago. Aside from that, it’s mostly just been generic pain.”

“Chest surgery?”

“Yeah. It felt like it was probably cosmetic. I’m guessing they’re… y’know, trans, but they might not be and it’s just hopeful thinking on my end.” He shrugged, noticing the way Arin frowned. “...what?”

“What do you mean hopeful thinking?”

“Oh! Oh, god, that sounds weird, shit. I just mean that like, I’m trans? And it’d be kinda cool to not have to worry that my soulmate is transphobic, you know? Because if they are, then they’d be cool with me.” He rubbed the back of his neck. “...I know that sounds weird.”

“...It doesn’t.” Arin smiled at him. “Sorry, I was scared you were like, one of those people that fetishizes trans people which is… nasty to say the least.”

“Yeah. Trust me, I’ve had run ins with those people.” He pushed hair out of his face. “I could’ve phrased that better. But yeah. It’s not that I’m hoping they’re trans, but I’m not… not hoping that?”

“Makes sense to me!” He hummed. “Since we’re on the topic, do you know if it’s possible to have… more than one soulmate?”

Dan tilted his head. “Probably. Why do you ask?”

“Well, Suzy and I are positive we’re soulmates. She and I have injured ourselves enough to figure that much out. But sometimes it’s like there’s pain from someone else. Like we’ll just be sitting on the couch or something and it’s like one of us banged our knee on something or scraped a hand. Like there’s someone else out there that we’re both connected to.”

Dan nodded. “I mean, that would make sense. I can’t think of any other explanation. Could be a platonic soulmate.”

“...Could be a romantic soulmate too.” Arin sighed a little. “I guess I kinda wonder about them and where they might be. Like, I wouldn’t mind having another partner, and Suzy has said she wouldn’t either. Maybe if we meet our other soulmate and they’re like super cool…” He shrugged, but winced and rubbed at his hand. “Well, either they just cut their hand or Suzy did.”

(Said soulmate was in front of a class and had given himself a nasty papercut. Said soulmate was also the person who was thinking about texting Dan at the time.)

“Ow. Like… a bad cut?”

“Not bad. Just like, if you get a papercut on cardboard.” He shook his hand around like it might help.

“Ew. Those suck.”

“Don’t they?” He hummed, finishing his coffee and glancing at a text. “I should run, though. Let me know when you decide, okay?”

“Okay.” Dan grinned. “See you soon?”

“See you soon Dan!” Arin waved, heading to leave.

Two weeks later, Dan woke up to a text from Arin. ‘Dude, I can not wait to get in your asshole.’ He snorted at that, rubbing his eyes. Of course that was the first day text Arin greeted him with.

‘Yeah, yeah, I’ll bring the lube. Mind sending me the address?’

He smiled when Arin sent it to him, quickly getting showered and dressed. He sent Brian a quick text he knew wouldn’t be seen for a few hours at least. By the time he pulled up to Arin’s house, there were already a few cars parked in the driveway and out front on the street.

Arin opened the door before he could even knock, wearing a cute blue skirt and what looked like eyeliner and mascara. “Hi Dan!”

“Hey Arin. Thanks again for the offer. I’m… actually super excited.”

“Good! Come on in, we’ll be getting started soon.” Arin bent down, scooping up a cat that was trying to sneak out the door. Dan giggled, following him inside.

Another cat peeked at him curiously, meowing. “Well hi there.”

“That’s Mochi, and the stupid brainless one in my arms is Mimi!” Arin walked over to a man at a computer, dumping Mimi on his lap. “Barry, this is Dan.”

Barry looked up, dropping his headphones from his head to around his neck. “Oh, hi Dan! Nice to finally meet you.”

Dan’s breath caught in his throat as he looked at Barry. He was… incredibly attractive with his fluffy looking hair and well trimmed beard. “H-hi!” His face flushed at the stutter and he quickly cleared his throat. “I’m excited to be here!”

Barry scratched Mimi’s head, smiling. “Great! Well, if you need anything, let me know, okay?”

“I will, thank you.” Dan smiled back, almost wanting to just stay and talk to Barry all day. But he turned back to Arin, following him into the kitchen like a lost puppy.

“Want a drink?” Arin opened the freezer to grab an ice tray.

“Um, do you have Pepsi?”

“I think so!” Arin opened the fridge, tossing a can to Dan.

“Thanks.” He watched as Arin got himself a glass of water. “... is the ice shaped like stars?”

“Yeah.” He grinned. “Suzy has a bunch of these silicone trays for like, candy making and stuff. But I use them for ice because it’s fun.”

“Because he’s a dork.” Suzy walked into the kitchen with a grin, scooting around Arin to grab a granola bar. “Hi Dan. Nice to officially meet you.”

“Hi Suzy. Congrats on the engagement!”

She grinned. “Aw, thanks. You gonna come to the wedding?”

“Name a time and place and I’m there for the cake.”

She laughed. “How sweet. Your name is on the guest list. And let Brian know he’s invited too. If he can get back, but only if it’s not too difficult.”

“I’ll tell him next time we talk, don’t worry.”

Suzy smiled. “Good.” She turned to Arin, talking to him for a minute about something Dan couldn’t pay attention to. He was sneaking glances at Barry, who’d put his headphones back on, editing videos with Mimi curled up on his lap. He found himself thinking about what it’d be like to kiss Barry and just talk to him.

He shook his head, trying to rid himself of the thoughts. He’d just met the guy, this was no time to be fantasizing.

Arin pulled him to the living room, which had been repurposed to be a recording room. “I’ve got everything all set up, all we need now is the hosts.” He winked at Dan, making him laugh.

As he sat on the couch, watching Arin set up, he winced and grabbed his thigh. “Ow!”

“What? You okay?”

Dan gave a little laugh. “Felt like a cat dug its claws into my leg. Except, yknow, not my leg.”

“Ouch.”

(In the other room, Barry was scolding Mimi after she’d gotten startled and dug into his leg.)

“Well, ready to start? Episode one, new not so grump?”

Dan giggled. “I’m ready.”

They were taking a short break when there was a knock at the door. Dan was sprawled out on the floor with Mochi, playing with him and grinning. Suzy answered, grinning. “Ross! You’re early.”

Ross laughed as he was pulled into a tight hug. “Hey Suze.” His voice was sleepy, his accent extra thick. “Rae came to pick me up and thought it’d be nice to swing by. They’re in the car so I can’t stay long.” Ross rubbed his eyes as he pulled back from the hug. “Dan, hi. It’s super cool to meet you in person.”

Arin ran in, tackling Ross in a tight hug. “Ross! Hi! You’re here! In my house!”

Ross snorted. “Yeah. And soon I’m going to leave to Rae’s house and take a whole nap.” He hugged Arin back. “...happy to be here.”

“You need to rest up! I can’t wait to officially have you on the channel.”

“I can’t wait either. But it’s nice to be here. Once I get my green card I can finally relax.” He sighed, pressing his face into Arin’s shoulder. “God, you’re comfy.”

“Careful Ross,” Suzy teased softly. “It’s addicting.”

Ross whined. “I have to get back to Rae.” He reluctantly pulled away, yawning widely.

“Get going.” Arin gave him a teasing butt swat, earning an indignant squeak.

“Stop it!” Ross stuck his tongue out tiredly, heading back to the car, arms stretched above his head.

Dan giggled, watching Ross go. “He seems nice.”

Arin grinned brightly. “He’s not. You’ll find that out soon enough.”

And Dan did. Ross wasn’t mean, per se. He just had a unique way of showing affection. Which was Dan being nice and not calling Ross a jerk. Ross liked to push buttons and find people’s limits, but god he was funny too. Dan found himself really enjoying Ross’s company.

It was nearly a year since he’d started. Arin and Suzy had gotten married and were a picturesque couple. Brian was back in America for a few weeks, sitting in the kitchen with Dan as they worked on some new songs.

Arin set a can of soda in front of Brian. “This is your favorite, right?”

“Oh, it is, yeah!” Brian smiled at him. “Thank you.” He had gained the slightest bit of an English accent, and Dan could tell he was being just a little bit flirty. Brian stood up, but somehow managed to have his shoelace untied, sending him falling. Right on his wrist.

“Ow!” The shout came from Brian. And Arin. And Dan was pretty sure he heard Suzy yelp deeper in the house.

Brian cradled his wrist to his chest, staring at Arin with wide eyes. Suzy came into the kitchen, rubbing her wrist. “Arin, you okay?” She paused, looking between the two. “...what?” Arin moved over to the table, bending his knee. “...Arin, no. Dont-” He kicked the table leg.

“...ow.” Brian winced, his foot curling instinctively from the pain.

“Brian, are you…?” Arin was staring at him. “I think you’re our soulmate.”

“...oh. Wow.” He paused. “Which one of you slammed your face into something and hurt your lip earlier this year?”

Suzy grinned, pointing at Arin, who groaned. “I got sick at a convention and slammed my face into a toilet.”

“That’s why he’s growing a mustache. It hides the scar on his lip.” She paused. “And you did something…. Not good to your wrist. I think we should get that checked out.”

Brian looked down at his wrist which was already looking bruised and maybe a little swollen. “...yeah, that’s a good idea.” He carefully got up, smiling shyly at Arin and Suzy.

Dan smiled a little. “You two can handle him, I assume?”

Arin nodded, wrapping an arm around Brian. “Yeah, we’ve got him.”

“You kids have fun on your first date to the hospital!”

Suzy laughed, making a face at Dan before they headed out to Arin’s car. Dan stretched and got up, looking to see who else was around. Ross was on the couch, working on his latest animation with headphones on, Mochi watching closely, his tail flicking idly. Barry was on his computer, editing an episode. Dan sat down next to him, smiling when Mimi decided to wind around his ankles, purring.

Barry slipped his headphones off. “Hi Dan. What’s up?”

“Well, Brian’s being taken to the hospital by Arin and Suzy.”

“...oh?”

“He tripped and did something to his wrist. Turns out Arin and Suzy are his soulmates!”

“Really?” He smiled faintly. “I can’t help but to be a little bit jealous.”

“You haven’t found them yet?”

“Nope.” Barry hummed. “I know they’re out there.” He rubbed his hip. “They bashed their hip into a table or a doorknob or something yesterday.”

“Ow. I know that hurts.” Dan giggled. “Did that to myself yesterday, too. And I can’t even blame it on them.”

“Oof.” Barry nodded, grinning at him. “Well, you’re a cool guy, I know whoever your soulmate is will love you!”

“Same for you. You just can’t help but to be a cute and funny guy, can you?”

“Absolutely not.” Barry lightly leaned into Dan as he looked back at his laptop. “So you’ve got the rest of the day off?”

“I do, yeah. How about I treat you to lunch later? For my favorite editor.” He draped an arm around Barry’s shoulders, content as the easy contact and comfort it brought.

“I… I think I’d like that.” He snuggled into the hold, going back to editing, not even moving to shift under Dan’s arm.

From that day, Dan and Barry weren’t dating, but they weren’t… not dating.

Brian on the other hand, with a sprained wrist, was easily and constantly flustered by Arin and Suzy’s sudden attention on him. It was simple gestures like quick hand squeezes and texts of things that made them think of him or Arin asking his opinion on an outfit. And it was the bigger things, like shy kisses and dates and genuine conversations. Arin liked to butt in on conversations and phone calls when Brian went back to London, but Dan couldn’t find it in himself to be bothered.

Brian had in him that he hated being so alone. That not having a partner kind of sucked and that being so far away hurt. But now he had Arin and Suzy too. It was kind of stupidly sweet when Arin smiled as he talked to Brian or when Suzy waved when she saw Brian on a video chat. They were just so cute.

He was laying in his apartment as another summer day began, wearing just his binder and a pair of boxers as he stared at the ceiling. He groaned as he reached to shift the fan to point at himself more. His phone went off with a text from Arin, and he tiredly lifted it to squint at the screen.

‘Hey, some of us are heading to the beach today! Want to join?’

Dan sat up, reaching for a hair tie. ‘Yeah, that sounds nice. Anything I should bring?’

‘Just your sexy bod ;)’

Dan laughed as he got up to search for his bathing suit, grabbing a bag for drinks and snacks. He hummed to himself as he changed, pulling on his blue swim trunks and his compression shirt, frowning as he looked at his silhouette in the mirror. He shook his head, but squared his shoulders, smiling at his reflection.

When he got to the beach, Arin and Suzy were flirting, Ross aimlessly digging a hole in the sand. Ross grinned. “Hi Dan! Want to get buried?”

“...thanks but no thanks.” He sat on his towel, starting to put on his sunscreen. “...are you trying to bury someone?”

“Rae said they might agree later! And maybe I can convince Barry.” He hummed, digging more.

“You’re dumb.” Dan grinned. “It’s hilarious.”

“What is?” Barry came over, dropping a bag on the sand.

“Ross.”

“Fair enough.” Barry pulled his shirt off, sitting down next to Dan. Dan glanced over, blushing when he realized Barry was shirtless. He had a soft body, though muscles were visible in his chest and biceps. Dan found himself staring at scars on Barry’s chest. “Eyes up here Dan.”

Dan’s face flushed red. “Sorry,” he squeaked, embarrassed.

“The scars are from… well, I had a top surgery a few years back.” He rubbed the back of his neck. “The scars have faded quite a bit. This is the first time I’ve been shirtless in public.”

“Really?” Dan smiled softly. “I thought about surgery, you know. But the idea makes me nervous and I seem to pass well with a binder.”

Barry blinked. “You…?”

“Yeah.” He smiled. “You know… my soulmate had some kind of chest surgery a few years back…”

“Really?” Barry looked at him with wide eyes. “...Can I try something?”

“Um… sure?” Dan frowned, but yelped when Barry slapped his arm. “What was that for?”

Barry rubbed his own arm, grinning brightly. “Just proving something.”

“You mean...?”

“Hi soulmate,” Barry whispered.

Dan laughed, cupping Barry’s cheek and pulling him into a kiss. “Hi.”

Barry pressed his face against Dan’s arm, his beard scratching softly against Dan’s skin. “I’m so happy it’s you.”

“Good. Because so am I.” Dan held Barry close, grinning. He couldn’t wait to spend forever with his soulmate.


End file.
